I am new to this Board and to this whole idea. I am 42 with LOR (AMH <0.16) and antral follicle count of 4. DH and I got married almost 2 years ago and have been TTC for a year and a half. We got pregnant in February but had a MMC in April at 8 weeks. My local RE recommended a "double down" cycle of IVF with genetic testing prior to implantation but estimates the chances of success at less than 5-10% per cycle. He says if we use DE the chances are 75% or higher on the first shot.
I am really struggling with deciding what to do. A huge part of me wants to at least try for a child that is both of us. But it would cost around $26k and will likely not work. Then what? Then go to DE or give up. So should we go straight to DE?
It sounds awful but I don't know how I would feel using DE. I wonder how I would deal with not knowing what my child would look or be like, knowing he/she would not look like me. Will others know and treat him/her differently? Will I? Will I feel connected? Do you tell your child about it and when? Will he/she hate me for it? Who else do you tell?
I am going crazy with all these questions in my head and thought it might be food to get perspective from people that have done or are doing it. Thanks in advance!
I am really struggling with deciding what to do. A huge part of me wants to at least try for a child that is both of us. But it would cost around $26k and will likely not work. Then what? Then go to DE or give up. So should we go straight to DE?
It sounds awful but I don't know how I would feel using DE. I wonder how I would deal with not knowing what my child would look or be like, knowing he/she would not look like me. Will others know and treat him/her differently? Will I? Will I feel connected? Do you tell your child about it and when? Will he/she hate me for it? Who else do you tell?
I am going crazy with all these questions in my head and thought it might be food to get perspective from people that have done or are doing it. Thanks in advance!