I am 45 and got married at 43. We went straight to the fertility dr due to my age, but ironically I was already pregnant at our appt and just did not know...I got pregnant on our first try. However, we lost that baby at 14 weeks, and I said I just could not go through that again. So we decided to try IVF with the chromosome testing. Long story short, we have done 5 rounds of IVF but only 3 retrievals as I ovulated through 2 of them. The last one was just a month ago and we got 24 eggs, which is apparently a lot for my age, but none were normal. All told they retrieved 51 eggs. And also my cycle got all messed up in the process and one month, I did not even realize I was ovulating and got pregnant again naturally but by accident, then had another miscarriage. So now, here I am and it seems like DE is the logical way to go but I just don't know how to let go of the idea of having my own biological child. I scroll through the pics of donors and instead of bringing me peace, it makes me feel really sad. And like I don't want to give up. But we have spent 75k and really don't have more to spend. Sorry this is so long. I just wonder if we should try one more time naturally with Clomid or move to DE. And if so, how do I accept that?
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