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Choosing a donor - Looks vs personal connection?

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My husband and I are on round 2 of finding an egg donor. Just as we were ready to start a cycle last month, our donor failed a drug test (not just marijuana). We were devastated.


Going through this arduous process, I have discovered the factors I most identify with about myself and hope to see reflected in my child as a representation of what I would have contributed: 


  • Dark brown hair (the dark part is very important to me)

  • Brown eyes

  • Education/intelligence

  • Similar BMI

The struggle - we have 2 finalists:


Donor 1:


  • 4 inches taller than me and a bit higher BMI

  • LIGHT brown hair

  • Very intelligent

  • Loved her essays- felt most connected to her "soul"

Donor 2:


  • Both DARK brown hair and eyes

  • Similar height/bit higher BMI

  • Intelligent

  • Nice essays - if I didn't read Donor 1's essays, I'd be very happy with her's

Does anyone have experience - thoughts on whether to go wtih closer looks or closer "internal qualities"?


Also if she and my husband have light brown/med brown hair, does anyone know if it is possible to produce a child with dark brown hair?


Thank you!


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